OPEN HOUSE, CLOSED HOUSE

Last week as I thumbed through my date book, I noticed a page I had apparently dogeared some months back; February to be precise. As I lifted the corner, I was met with horror as one of my baby blue foot shaped paper clips, peaked out at me. Now to the average observer, a baby blue foot shaped paper clip, may simply indicate that a page, perhaps, has been marked. But not to me. Clearly, it was a paper clip code! And a baby blue foot shaped paper clip code indicates URGENT!

With trembling hands I smoothed out my calendar to reveal that fated message: Plan and schedule a Parent Night Open House for this month. Oops. In a mad dash I called the other 8th grade leadership teacher, and was met with a calm, "It's really not a big deal. Remember last year and all the work we put into it?" I thought a minute. Yep. I did remember last year, but that was last year. This year we have a whole new group of teachers' fresh out of college. Our students really like them, I thought, so they'll want to at least show off their teachers' to their parents'. They would jump on this thing, I thought.

Busily, the two of us decided on a date. "I'll put out a flier and get it to the kids next week. Let's say Tuesday and Wednesday." I agreed that it was a good plan, but not the only plan. On Monday, prior to Thursday, I began my campaign. I took a count of hands. Possibilities went up here and there. I volunteered fabulous works of intelligences for display. More hands revealed themselves to me. On Tuesday, I asked other teachers what they were going to bring, and I showed them what I would bring. During classes that day, I took another count of hands - "How many will be attending with your parents on Thursday?" Uhm... "How many will maybe attend on Thursday?" "Is anyone planning to attend this Thursday?" Uhm... I wondered if Thursday was a bad day.

I rung up my colleague who answered his phone quite exasperatedly. I hoped he hadn't run across the room to the phone, but I soon learned why he was out of breath. "Wait a minute. I see another one." I just had to ask. Another what? "Another one of those fliers I passed out today. My trash is full of 'um because I keep finding them on the floor and outside on the ground. Shouldn't they be putting 'um in their backpacks?"

So... visions of last year visited my mind once more, and again I told myself that this year wouldn't be like last year, or the year before, or even the year before that. And it wasn't. Instead of 9 parents attending Parent Night, this year we had 3... And two of them are teachers.

So what's next? Send each parent a personal invitation autographed by their own child? Offer a free spaghetti or taco or, a choice between hamburgers and hot dogs sizzling right off the grill dinner? Perhaps a theater production complete with a full string orchestra to go along with their eating pleasure? Or maybe we could add local celebrities to be a part of the show!

We've done it (really!) and it works, but why should teachers have to add another full time job to their already full time and half job? So that the community can get a glimpse of what they are paying for, or for a free dinner show? The following year our school could still feel the cracking of our stiff and hobbled bones, so we settled for dinner and student projects; something student led.

As a result, the number of guests have continued to decline. Dinner has gone by the wayside, but our fabulous chocolate chip cookies with the best punch in town is still served. After all, Open House should not take two months of planning, nor should a teachers' time be dominated by producing an off broadway spectacular, unless of course, she's the drama teacher. I wonder... Could it be that I buried my baby blue foot shaped paper clip under that dogeared page for a reason?